Drive My Soul
by tawnyscrawnylion
Summary: Bella is ready to let Edward go. She's fallen in love with Jacob Black and is finally happy. But, of course, Edward has to return and shake things up again! Please Review! rated T for language and some mild adult content.
1. Chapter 1

_Page 376 - New Moon / This is after Jacob saves Bella, and they're in the truck in front of Charlie's house. The italicized portion was taken from the book, but I left a couple sentences out. This is the part right before Jacob smells the vampire, re-written _my_ way. This story will be eight chapters long, and all eight are finished. I'll update each chapter everyday. I wrote this as a "prequel" sortof for a story I'm currently writing. I plan on having the current story finished, or at least more than halfway done before I start uploading. Anyways. Enjoy, and please review if you like it. Reviews make me very happy and motivated! :D  
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_"Sorry. I know you don't feel exactly the way I do, Bells. I swear, I don't mind. I'm just so glad you're okay that I could sing- and that's something no one wants to hear." He laughed his throaty laugh in my ear._

_My breathing kicked up a notch, sanding the walls of my throat._

_Jake pressed his warm cheek against the top of my hair._

_If I turned my face to the side- if I pressed my lips against his bare shoulder... I knew without any doubt exactly what would follow. It would be very easy. There would be no need for explanations tonight._

_Butterflies assaulted my stomach as I thought about turning my head._

And then I made a choice- a conscious effort to stop thinking with my head and let my heart take over. I did it. I turned my head, ever so slightly, to the left, my lips pressed against Jacob's bare chest. My stomach was doing flips and twists and spins. Jacob held his breath. I barely pulled my head away before softly placing my lips on his chest again, in the same spot, so he knew I was serious, so his suspicions would be confirmed. No, this wasn't his imagination. I had just kissed Jacob Black.

He let out the breath he'd been holding and held my head with his hands. I shifted my body so my face was more level with his. His onyx eyes burned into mine and my face flushed. My stomach did another flip when I saw him smirk. Instinctively, we both leaned in towards each other, stopping when our faces were only millimeters apart. This is it. Time to let Edward go, and open my heart to Jake.

"Bella," he whispered, his voice low and huskier than usual, "Are you sure?"

I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded, unable to speak.

Then it happened. His lips met mine with a softness and a heat that could not be described. I hadn't realized how rigid my body had been until I relaxed into his kiss. Simultaneously our lips parted, and his warm tongue met mine. An electric current flowed through my body as he pressed his lips just a little harder against mine. His fingers slid to the back of my head and knotted in my hair. My arms were wrapped tightly around his waist.

The kiss started to heat up, and things were getting more intense. My leg was cramping from the way I was sitting in the seat so I repositioned myself. That's when I felt the stiffness in his pants, and I immediately jumped out of the way. He moaned, exasperated.

"Uhm," I swallowed, hard. "Uhm, I'm sorry Jacob. I just can't.. I can't get too deep into this right now. I need to take baby steps." He smiled down at me, his teeth brilliantly white against his russet skin.

"That's fine, Bella. I understand completely. No rush."

I sighed with relief and scooted closer to him. I kissed him lightly on the cheek and leaned in to whisper in his ear. "Thank you, Jacob, for everything."

He was still smiling at me when he reached for the door of the truck. He took my hand in his and pulled me out of the truck with him. An arctic gust of wind blew right past us and Jacob turned green.

"UGH!" he exclaimed, "Holy _crap_!" I stared at him, puzzled, while he clutched his stomach.

"BELLA!" he roared, "Get in the truck, _now_!" I was still confused but jumped back into the truck. He followed me in and turned the key. He threw the car into drive and floored down my street, back towards La Push. The car groaned and sputtered in protest and Jacob shook uncontrollably.

"Jake, Jacob?" I said. "Jake, calm down. Take a deep breath. What is going on?"

"_Leeches_," was all he managed to choke out. I suddenly felt sick. Was _Victoria_ at my house? Then I felt a hole blow through my chest. _Charlie_.

"CHARLIE!" I screamed, panicking.

"He's fine, he's with Sue Clearwater and Billy. We'll go by the Clearwater's place and I'll talk to Billy. He'll be able to keep Charlie busy at the Clearwater's. You'll stay with me tonight. I've got to morph really quick though to let Sam know.." his voice trailed off. He turned to look at me. I knew I must have looked awful. I could feel my face twisted in fear.

"Don't worry, Bells. We'll keep you safe. We're the protectors, and that's exactly what we're going to do."


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N:**__ This chapter is a little fluffy.. But don't worry. The drama will pick up __**soon**_**, **_hehehe. Please Review! :)_

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The ride to La Push was agonizing and frightful. I clutched Jacob's right hand as he drove with the left. The twelve minutes that it took us to get to Sue Clearwater's house felt like twelve years. We finally arrived, and Jacob and I walked hand-in-hand into the house. I guess Jacob was comfortable here, he didn't bother knocking.

"Hello? It's Jacob," he said as we walked through the entryway into the kitchen. There was a big round wooden table with five chairs, two of which were occupied. Charlie and Billy sat on either side of Sue, who was silently sobbing into her hands. Charlie looked helpless as his eyes met mine. My heart cried for poor Sue. I knew how she felt. I knew what it was like for the love of your life to suddenly disappear. But at least he didn't _leave_. He didn't have a choice. Henry Clearwater would never have hurt Sue on purpose. My heart burned and ripped and snarled. I held my arms across my chest and pressed my lips firmly together to keep from crying.

"Hey, Dad, can I talk to you for a sec?" Jacob asked Billy. Billy looked at me, then at Jacob, who nodded.

"Sure, son." Billy wheeled his chair around and headed towards the front of the house. Jacob turned around and kissed me on the cheek, very softly, in a way that Charlie could easily mistake for friendship. I didn't need to tell Charlie about Jacob and I right now. Hell, I was still confused myself.

I sat down next to Sue at the table. I didn't know her well, but my heart wrenched for this poor woman. The three of us sat in silence for about ten minutes, Charlie's arm comfortingly around Sue's shoulders, waiting for Billy and Jacob to come back. When they finally came back into the house, Billy shot me a sympathetic look. Why did I need the sympathy right now? Harry Clearwater just died! And Jacob and the rest of the wolves were about to go up against a vampire! Why was _I_ getting the sympathy?

"Sue, you shouldn't stay here alone right now. Charlie and I will stay the night with you." Sue and Charlie both looked up at Billy, confusion etched in their faces. Suddenly Sue turned from pale white to pale green, and she seemed to understand the situation. Poor Charlie, he had no clue. If only I could tell him. I almost laughed at the thought of his reaction.

"Hey, Dad," I imagined myself saying, "Jacob's a werewolf and I'm going to stick with him tonight because a vampire named Victoria is trying to kill me since Edward killed her lover. Oh yeah, Edward's a vampire too."

"Oh, okay Bells," he would say back. Haha, yeah right.

Billy suddenly cleared his throat, snapping me back to reality. "Bella, why don't you and Jacob drive to my place and pick up some clothes for me? I need to change."

"Sure," I replied. I walked over to Charlie and kissed him on the cheek. Even though I didn't know Sue well, I squeezed her shoulder empathetically. Her eyes met mine, and as pained as she was, she smiled sincerely up at me. I smiled back.

"Everything will be okay, Sue." I said, gaining a funny look from Charlie.

Jacob and I drove to Billy's house. While I rummaged through Billy's closet for some sweats, a pair of jeans, and a shirt, Jacob was outside in his wolf form updating Sam and the others on the situation. I was nervous, my hands wouldn't stop shaking. Jacob had smelled a vampire in my house. But he was sure it wasn't Victoria. It made me sick to my stomach, and I almost hurled. I thought about Victoria pairing up with another vampire, to use as a distraction to get to me. To kill me. What if Harry Clearwater hadn't died? Would Charlie have been at the house when Victoria or the unknown vampire showed up? I nearly threw up again.

I heard Jacob come back into the house. His heavy feet thudded against the floors, and I could hear him getting closer to my room. I wiped the tears from my eyes that I hadn't realized formed and snatched up Billy's clothes. I ran to the door and reached it before Jacob did.

"Hey," I smiled at him.

"Hey," he said. "You ready?"

"Yep."

We drove to Sue's house and dropped the clothes off. Then Jacob and I went back to his house. It was nearly midnight by this time, and my eyes were insanely heavy with sleep. I pulled the grey cotton sweats on that Jacob had offered to me. They were insanely huge but very comfortable. When I walked out to the kitchen to get a drink of water, Jacob was sprawled out on the couch, his head and ankles hanging off either end. I felt bad for him, thinking that he should be in the bed and _I_ should be on the couch.

I sat down on the couch by Jacob's feet and sighed. He sat up and looked at me funny.

"What?" He asked.

"It's not fair," I started. His whole face turned down as he frowned.

"I know, Bella. You're just a human. The stupid _leeches_ that you hung out with got you caught up in this crap." he growled.

"No, Jake, that's not what I'm talking about. I mean, that's not really fair either, but that's not what I was talking about," I rambled. He looked at me with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh?"

"I meant it's not fair that you're twenty feet tall and sleeping on the couch, while I'm taking up your whole bed. You can have the bed, Jake. Let me take the couch." I said.

"No way, Bella, I'm fine on the couch. Go to bed, I'll see you in the morning." He smiled at me sweetly.

I trudged into Jacob's bedroom. There was no winning this argument. I curled up into the bed and let the sleep take me over.

_Red. Red flames licking up Jacob's russet face. Why was Jake on fire? I squinted, trying to see the fire more clearly. I screamed when I realized it wasn't fire- it was Victoria. Victoria had snapped Jake's neck and was drinking his blood. I screamed and screamed as Victoria slowly walked towards me. I was frozen in fear. RUN! I told myself. She laughed. I screamed. BELLA! BELLA!! BELLA!! This time the warning voice in my head wasn't Edward's.. It was.. BELLA._

"Bella!" Jake yelled, gently shaking me. My eyes shot open. It was only a dream.

"Oh, Jake!" I cried, throwing my arms around his neck. I sobbed into his bare chest and even though I was incredibly embarrassed, I was comforted in his warm embrace.

"Bella, it's okay. You're fine, it was just a bad dream," his husky voice cooed. I let out another round of sobs before pulling away and wiping my eyes dry.

"Jake, I'm so scared. I don't want you to fight Victoria. I don't want you to die!" I started panicking, my breathing became increasingly difficult.

"Bella," he laughed. "Oh, Bella, you worry too much. I'm your protector, remember? This is what I was _made_ to do. You have nothing to worry about. I won't get hurt. I'll have Sam and the rest of the pack. We'll _all_ be fine." He pulled me tightly into a hug, squeezing the breath out of me.

"HAAAG!" I said in an effort to pull air into my lungs. "JAKE, CANT BREEVE!" He let me go and started laughing.

"Sorry, Bells." We sat there in the dark silence for a long minute before I found my voice.

"Jake?" I asked.

"Hmm?"

"Would you stay with me tonight? In here, in the bed I mean.." I said, my cheeks blushing furiously.

"Uh, sure. If you're comfortable with it."

"Definitely. Please stay with me," I smiled up at him. He smiled back as he laid down in the bed, pulling me with him. I turned my back to his chest and he wrapped his burning arms around my body.

"I love you, Bells," he murmured into my ear just before I dozed off again.


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N:**__ Be prepared for a LONG chapter, haha. My apologies. I didn't want to break it up into two chapters, but I really wanted this chapter to be detailed, so the next chapter will be fairly short. But, I promise I'll make up for it with the fifth chapter! :D Please review._

The light blazed into the room, which confused me. I was swelteringly hot, and absentmindedly went to pull off the covers, before realizing I had none. Instead, Jacob's huge arms were wrapped tightly around my body. I gently picked him off me and rolled out from under him, miscalculating the space on the bed and hitting the floor with a loud _thud_. Jacob didn't even stir.

I snuck out of the bedroom and into the front room where I'd left my backpack. My toothbrush was in there, and I pulled it out and headed to the bathroom. I turned the handle and let the cold water rush out of the faucet. Cupping it in my hands, I threw the frigid water over my face. Leaving the water on, I blotted my face with a towel hanging from the shower rod and then proceeded to put toothpaste onto my toothbrush. I stared into the mirror at my reflection. My eyes were dark from lack of sleep and an overabundance of stress. And then I did something I typically didn't let myself do- I let my thoughts wander. Not just anywhere. I let my thoughts wander to Edward.

What would Edward think about this whole situation? He'd be absolutely paranoid, that's for sure. Or would he? He did leave me, after all. Would he really care enough about me to put his life on the line to save me? Or was he sick of saving me? And would Jacob get sick of saving me, too? I sighed and proceeded to brush the left side of my mouth now. Wouldn't Edward, wherever he was at, whatever he felt, want me to be _happy_? And with Jacob, I was incredibly happy. He was my sun, the ray of light that kept me warm when my memories threatened to freeze my body from the inside out. That's when I heard it. A soft, velvety voice, perfectly clear in my head, even though I wasn't in any kind of danger.

"Be Happy," it breathed. I stood completely still, willing the voice to come back. And then it hit me- Edward _did_ want me to be happy. He wanted me to be happy with Jacob. And that's exactly what I was going to do. I was going to be utterly and completely blissful with my wolf, Jacob.

I rinsed off my toothbrush and rinsed out my mouth, shut the water off, and dried my face with a towel. I ran into Jacob's bedroom where he was sleeping completely soundly.

"JAKE!" I yelled as loud as I could. He sat straight up in his bed and looked around, confused.

"What, Bella? What's wrong?" he said, his voice thick with sleep.

"Jake, I'm _happy_. And it's okay! It's okay that I'm happy, happy with you!" I said, ecstatic.

"What? What are you rambling about?" he said, still groggy.

"Jacob Black, I am ready to do this, ready to make this work."

"You're ready to be mine?" he asked, smiling broadly. I just nodded. He continued, "You're over Edward?"

"Jacob, I am completely and wholly yours. There is no Edward in this equation, there is no one to 'get over'. There is just Bella Swan, who is in love with Jacob Black. That's all there is to it."

He grabbed me and pulled me into a tight embrace, his hot lips softly pressing against my forehead. My stomach did flips and my breathing stopped. He let go of me enough that, if I was able to, I could continue breathing. But I couldn't find my lungs. I was telling my brain, _breathe in!_, I demanded it. But the wires were crossed, and all I could do was hear the incredibly thumping of my heart. Jacob leaned his face into mine and his lips pulled mine into a hot and passionate kiss. I ran my fingers through his hair as he held my face with his enormous hands. Opening my mouth, I allowed his tongue to explore further. I pressed myself harder into him, pressed my mouth harder against his.

He stopped suddenly, his face flushing. I felt my cheeks burn, looking at his redder-than-usual cheeks.

"Jake, don't be embarrassed. It's okay," I started, but he cut me off.

"It's not that Bella," he smiled. "Billy and Charlie just pulled up here. I can hear the car outside. I'm going to jump on the couch. You stay in here."

With that, he lept from the bed, bent down and pecked me on the forehead before dashing into the living room. I sighed and lay back into the bed. How was it that something so perfect, so wonderful could happen to me? I was, for the first time since Edward (no wincing!) left, completely and wonderfully blissful. I heard Charlie's voice, muted through the walls of the house, obviously talking to Billy. No more than five seconds later, the door clicked.

"Oh, hey Dad, hey Charlie," I heard Jacob say, feigning sleep in his voice. "I didn't expect you two here so soon. How's Sue doing?"

"She's fine, Jacob, thanks for asking," Charlie said.

"Where's Bella?" Billy asked, and I swore I could hear a tone in his voice. I took that as my cue to defend myself.

"Hey, guys. What's up?" I said, strolling out of Jacob's room in the too-big grey cotton and kissing Charlie on the cheek.

"Well, Bella, I was just making sure you're okay. We came here so Billy could change, then we're both running back to my house so I can get some clothes, then we have to run into Port Angeles and pick up a few things for Sue." My heart sank. I felt nauseous. Charlie couldn't go to the house, not with vampires there! Jacob seemed to know what I was thinking, and he cut in.

"Hey, Charlie, do you mind if Bella and I go take a walk?"

"Sure, Jake, go right ahead." He smiled.

When Jake and I were finally down at the beach, I lost it.

"JACOB! How could you let Charlie go back there!? With vampires! It's a death trap!"

"Don't worry, Bella. Sam and Embry were watching the house all night, and they're there right now. The vampire who was there earlier yesterday is gone for now. Charlie will be fine," his voice soothingly reassured me.

"Oh," I breathed. I hadn't realized I'd been holding my breath until I let it go.

"Hey, let's go to Emily's. I have to run with my brothers for a little bit, and you'll be safe at Emily's."

"Sure," I said, letting him grab my hand and walk me back to his Rabbit. We got in and drove the five minutes into La Push to Emily's house.

When we got to the quaint, weathered home, I could smell something delicious and warm coming from the house. When Jacob opened the door, the scent of fresh muffins, eggs, and bacon hit me like a ton of bricks. I hadn't realized until now, but I was _starving_. Which meant Jake must be completely famished.

"Smells _amazing_, Emily!" I said, smiling. She blushed a little and smiled at me.

"Thank you, Bella,"

"Yom. Nom, dees rilly goo, Em!" Jacob said, stuffing another muffin into his mouth. Sam walked through the door and in two long strides was already at Emily's side. His eyes burned into hers, both of them caught up in a private but intensely passionate moment. It was so beautiful and profound I could hardly breathe. And then I realized something- it didn't hurt. The hole inside, it wasn't burning, wasn't ripping. It was fixed. _I_ was fixed. Jacob turned and kissed me on the cheek before leaving with Sam to go patrol for a couple hours.

"So, Bella, what's the deal with you and Jacob?" Emily asked as I helped her bake twelve dozen cookies for the boys. I nearly dropped the baking sheet I was pulling out of the oven. I didn't tell her, so how did she know?

"Uhm, what do you mean?" I tried to ask nonchalantly, but my voice cracked and gave me away.

She chuckled. "Bella, I can see the way you two look at each other. You look at each other like I look at Sam. Has he _imprinted_ on you?" She asked, her voice full of excitement.

I didn't know. I didn't _think_ we imprinted. After all, I didn't feel any different around Jacob than I did last week. Or maybe, maybe we imprinted so long ago, long before he became a wolf, back when I'd known that he filled the nasty void in my soul.

"I don't think so," I said carefully, trying not to sound disappointed. I wasn't sure why, but the fact that Jacob hadn't imprinted on me made me want to cry. "I think our friendship just... Evolved. I mean, I don't feel any differently about him than I did a day, a week, or a month ago. I still care about him and I still love him the same. I just think it's being interpreted differently. I thought I had loved him as a friend, a very best friend. But now I know that Jacob means _so_ much more to me than just a friend. He was there for me, he helped fix me up, and what I feel for him extends far beyond gratitude. I am absolutely in love with him." I said, not realizing how deeply I'd opened up to Emily. She just smiled at us, like she knew a secret I didn't.

A voice cleared behind me. I whipped around to see who'd been standing there for my little rave.

"I love you, too, Bella," Jacob said, grinning from ear to ear. I blushed, but he walked over to me and kissed my forehead. Behind him was Sam, Embry, and Jared. I blushed even further. _Everyone_ had heard my confession. So _that's_ why Emily was smiling.

"Jaaaacob, I wuuuuuv you," Embry teased. Jacob picked up an empty baking sheet and threw it at him, which smacked Embry right in the face. His nose started bleeding, and I panicked for a second, before realizing that werewolves don't freak out and attack at the smallest sight of blood. I sighed a sigh of relief.

"Geezus, man, I was just teasing. Sorry Bella," Embry said, wiping his nose clean. The blood had already stopped. Crazy werewolves and their freakish ability to heal in superspeed.

After Jacob and the other boys ate their cookies, Jacob and I went outside and walked to Billy's house. It took us about twenty minutes, but we strolled leisurely and took our time. My truck was sitting there in front of the house.

"Hey Jake?" I asked. He looked down at me.

"Hmm?"

"You said my house is safe, right?"

"Yeah, we had Paul watch it all night."

"You think we could head over there and I could take a shower and change my clothes?" I asked.

"I don't know, Bella.." he started. "It seems a little risky, what with the leech so desperate for your life," he said, running his hand through his hair.

"Jake, you'll be with me the whole time. I'm safe with you," I said.

He sighed heavily and looked down at me for a long time. "Okay, fine, but just a shower and clothes!"

"Thanks Jake," I said as I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him.

I typically turn the water on and then wait for it to heat up before I got into the shower, but I was so eager to clean up that I just jumped right in. The frigid water pelted me, it's icy beads sinking into my skin and freezing me to the core. It felt good, it felt familiar. It felt like Edward. I braced, waiting for the wincing, waiting for the pain, waiting for the despair, waiting to fall apart. Nothing happened. I didn't wince. I didn't fall apart. The water was getting warmer and warmer, until it was burning hot. The fiery water burned into my skin, and it calmed me, made me feel safe. I smiled at the ridiculousness. I was comparing my _love life_ to a _shower_. Edward, the cold, felt so right, so dangerous. Jacob, the hot, was comforting, and safe. And in the bigger picture, I take a hot shower everyday. Never a cold shower.

After I finished my overanalyzing of my shower, I got out and headed to my room. Jake was downstairs rummaging through the kitchen, looking for something to eat. I grabbed a duffel I had and filled it with all my jeans, a couple sweaters, and a few shirts. I wasn't too sure how long I'd be gone, wasn't sure when the wolves would find Victoria, and even when- even _if_- I wasn't even sure they'd win. It was so hard for me to picture. My beautiful Jacob, human and helpless in front of Victoria. Last night's dream crept back into my mind. No, I pushed the thoughts out of my mind. Jake was strong, and the pack was tight. He would win, he would kill Victoria, and we would live happily ever after without fear. I smiled.

The phone ringing downstairs snapped me out of my daydreaming.

"Do you want me to get that?" Jacob yelled up at me.

"Sure, I'm on my way down!" I zipped up my duffel and skipped down the stairs. I froze when I saw Jacob's face. It was hard. It was angry, and full of fear. His onyx eyes glowered as he sneered at the phone.

"He's at the funeral." Then silence. _Who the hell was on the phone?_, I thought to myself.

"Why is it any of _your_ business?" he sneered.

"Jake, who is it?" I asked. He dismissed me with a wave of his hand, which pissed me off. "JAKE!" I yelled, as loud as I could, "GIVE ME THE PHONE." His eyes flashed from rage, to sorrow, to pity, to rage again. I was so utterly confused.

"Here's _Bella_," he growled. He handed me the receiver for the phone. I looked up at him, puzzled, trying to figure out his expression.

"Hello?" I asked cautiously. A voice as smooth as velvet whispered back at me.

"Bella?" My hands started to tremble. A lump caught in my throat. _Keep it together,_ I told myself. _Do. Not. Cry._

"Who is this?" I demanded, trying hard to follow my own instructions. My body didn't want to listen. Tears of sorrow, and of anger, welled up in my eyes. I blinked hard to keep the back. "Who _is_ this!?" I screamed into the phone, my voice cracking. I looked around the room, which was spinning insanely fast now. Where was Jacob? I spoke into the phone again. "Who is this?" I barely whispered.


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N:**__ This chapter is a little short, but the next one will be a _lot_ longer, I swear. Oh, and another thing.. Reviews make me happy, they make me want to upload the next chapter sooner. Hint hint hint :)_

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"Bella, hang up the phone," Jacob pleaded, reappearing from the kitchen.

"Bella, it's me, it's Edward," the voice croaked on the phone. _NO!_ My thoughts raged in my head. Jacob looked at me, pleading.

"Hang up the phone, Bella," Jacob said again, as a demand now, not as a request.

"Jake, shut up!" I screamed. I couldn't concentrate. Couldn't focus. What the _fuck_ was going on? Who started this? This _sick_ joke. It couldn't be Edward. _Edward_. The name ripped through my insides like a derailed train. I felt nauseous.

"Bella, are you okay?" the velvet voice on the phone asked.

"No! What the fuck? Are you kidding me!? AM I OKAY!?" I cried. My brain was all foggy and weird. It was getting harder to breathe.

"Bella, shh, calm down." The voice demanded me.

"DO NOT TELL ME TO CALM DOWN EDWARD CULLEN!" I screamed. "You _left_ me, I haven't heard from you in _months_, and now you call me out of the blue, for no _fucking_ reason, and tell me to CALM DOWN!?" I started laughing. I was hysterical. The anger surged through my body like a tsunami.

"Bella, please, let me explain," the voice pleaded. I looked around. Jacob was gone again. "Bella, Alice saw you, she saw you jumping off a cliff, and then when you hit the water, she saw nothing. Bella, we thought you _died_." He paused, but I had no words. I had nothing to say to _him_.

"Hum," was all I could manage. My brain was short-circuiting. I couldn't focus, and it was getting harder to breathe.

"Oh, Bella," the voice cried. "Bella, I'm so sorry. I'm so incredibly very sorry. I'm in Mexico right now, I'm on my way up. I'll be in Forks in a day and a half. No, I'll be there _tomorrow_. Tomorrow evening. Please, Bella, we need to talk." I finally snapped back into reality.

"_NO!_ No way! No, no no," was all I could say. What was he thinking? Could he really just _waltz_ back into my life after months of no contact? After shattering my heart into a trillion pieces? There was one answer; _no_.

"Bel-" he started, but then the line died. I was confused. I looked around. Jacob was back. He had pulled the phone line out of the jack. I crumpled onto the floor and sobbed. I felt his flaming arms pick me up and carry me to the couch. I laid there in his lap, sobbing, for a long time. He just stroked my hair and kissed the top of my head as my heart re-broke all over again. Hours later, I had finally cried out all my tears, and I sat up to look at Jacob.

"What do I do?" I asked him. I knew he wouldn't have the right answer. He was incredibly biased. But I had no one to ask.

"I'll take you to Billy's, and you'll stay in La Push. I'm not going to worry about Edward coming here, I've got to focus all my attention on Victoria. I just want you _safe_, Bella, and I want you _happy_."

I nodded, unable to speak. My mind raced. Edward was coming back, back to Forks. What would I say? What would I do? And why did he care if I jumped off a freaking cliff or not? He left me, he obviously doesn't care about me anymore. It was all so much, _too_ much. But I needed to know. He'd be here, and I needed answers.

"Jacob, I need to talk to Edward," I said, bracing myself for his response.

"Absolutely not," he said, his voice calm and collected, which startled me.

"Jacob, I need to know, I need answers. Answers that only Edward can answer."

"Bella, please," his voice pleaded. I looked into his eyes. They were filled with pain.

"Jacob, you have to understand-" I didn't get to finish.

"NO! I SAID NO, AND I MEANT IT. PLEASE, Bella, PLEASE, I'm trying to stay calm, and you are _not_ helping. Just shut up and leave it alone!"

I jumped off the couch and stormed out of the house too the truck. This was _bullshit_, Jacob couldn't keep me from seeing Edward. He wasn't my father, he had no authority. Edward would be here tomorrow, and I needed to talk to him. Where could I go until then? Somewhere Jake wouldn't, _couldn't_ follow me.

_The Cullen's house._ Jake would never follow me there. I turned the key and threw the truck into drive before peeling down the road toward the outskirts of town.


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N:**__ This chapter was super hard to write, because I wanted to get it _just right_, and I'm still not one thousand percent satisfied with it, but it's better than the first edition of this chapter I wrote, haha. Hope you enjoy! And PLEASE review :D_

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I pulled the truck off the road and onto the tiny, secluded path that I knew so well. It was getting late, and I wanted to get into the house before it got too dark. I drove a little too fast down the driveway, my tires shredding the gravel beneath me. I had prepared myself to go in the house. I was absolutely sure it wouldn't hurt. It wouldn't rip or burn. I wasn't sure, however, if it would be empty or furnished, so I was glad I had a sleeping bag in the truck.

I slammed on the brakes, sucking in a deep breath. _Oh my god_, I thought. When I pulled into the clearing, I saw something that I _really_ wasn't expecting. The lights were on. The lawn was mowed. There was a black Mercedes- which I recognized as Carlisle's car- parked out front. I panicked and planned to turn the car around. Before I could move my foot from the brake to gas, someone had jumped into my truck and threw themself into me. I screamed. It was _Victoria. _I was going to _die_ today. Poor Jacob.

Then I realized my neck wasn't snapping, I wasn't dying. I was being... Hugged?

"Oh, Bella, I am so happy you're alive!"

"ALICE!?" I shrieked with excitement. "ALICE, am I dreaming?" She released me and smiled broadly at me.

"No way, Bella, this isn't a dream! I'm so so happy you're alive, and even _happier_ you decided to come here!"

"Alice, I missed you so much!" I screamed. Joy filled my heart, engulfing every last corner of my soul. Alice was here. Everything was all better now.

"So, let me get this straight, you _jumped_ off a _cliff_, just for fun?" Alice's beautiful voice sang, completely puzzled. I grinned sheepishly, my cheeks flushing.

"Yeah," I said. "It was stupid, but it was incredibly exhilirating!"

"You're so weird, Bella Swan." We both started laughing. I was ecstatic. Alice and I had spent the last two hours catching up. I yawned, I was drained from the emotional day I'd had.

"Come on, Bella, you need sleep. Why don't you go lay on Edward's couch?" she asked. I _was_ incredibly tired.

"You'll be here when I wake up tomorrow morning, right?"

"Of _course_!" she assured me.

I trudged up the stairs in this magnificently beautiful house as I recalled the memories of my day. Alice was here, and Edward would be here tomorrow. How I'd missed _both_ of them. It didn't seem real. Was this just a figment of my imagination, much like Edward's voice in my head? Was I only imagining Alice was here, laughing with me and holding my hand? Was I only imagining that Edward would be here tomorrow? Did I imagine the phone call we'd had earlier?

No, I thought, just feet from Edward's bedroom door. It was real. It was happening. I put my hand on the doorknob and pushed, taking in Edward's room. It was dark, and the light was on the other side of the vast room. My eyes strained in the dark. The room looked the same, like it was completely untouched. The walls were covered in CDs, the stereo was against the wall, and the couch was-- I froze. The _couch_.

"Oh!" I yelled.

"Surprise?" Edward flashed a smile and held his arms out.

"What?" I couldn't think clearly.

"I came early. I took a plane. I couldn't wait to see you, Bella."

"Edward?"

"Hahaha," he laughed. "Why, were you expecting someone else?" He closed the space between us before I could blink and pulled me into a tight embrace. My head was swimming.

"Wait, wait, wait!" I yelled. He released me and look confused. "No, Edward, no. This is all wrong. You _left_ me there in the forest, and now you just expect you can waltz back into my life and everything will be fine and fucking dandy?" Edward sighed heavily, his shoulders slumped.

"I figured this would happen..." he started. "Bella, when I left, I was trying to _protect_ you. I wanted you to be safe, and I thought the only way that would happen was if I was gone. And I tried, I really really tried to forget you. But you were everywhere. You were in everything I did. And then Alice saw your future disappear, and I panicked. I was making plans to go to Italy. And then I called for Charlie. And some guy answered the phone, and said that Charlie was at the funeral. And I freaked out, I thought he meant _your_ funeral."

"You thought I was..." I couldn't finish the sentence.

"Yes," he sighed. His voice picked back up. "But you're _not_! You're alive, Bella! And I'm back, I'm here for you. I'm so sorry I left, Bella. I don't know how I'll ever forgive myself for breaking you like that..." His voice trailed off as he lifted a finger to my cheekbone.

"I took your advice," I whispered. He looked at me and I couldn't read the expression in his eyes.

"What advice?" he asked cooly.

"I've moved on, Edward. I found someone else." His whole body went rigid, and his face went blank.

"Wow," was all he said. It was silent for a long time before he spoke again. "Alice didn't see that one. I wonder why..." he thought to himself. At that very second, Alice burst into the room.

"BELLA! Why didn't you tell me?" she cried.

"You didn't ask," I replied simply. I was nervous now. Alice was upset, and Edward was, well, unreadable. Which was frightening.

"Who is he?" they both asked at the same time.

"His name is Jacob. He lives in La Push," I started, realizing I'd said too much.

"Jacob _what_?" Edward snarled. I was scared stiff at this point.

"Jacob Black, why? What's going on?" I asked, utterly confused.

Alice and Edward stared at each other. Alice didn't move, but Edward's lips quivered rapidly. He was talking to her, but I couldn't hear a sound. After a while, Edward shot me a pained look.

"Bella, is Jacob a shapeshifter?" he asked be, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Maybe, what's it to you?" I tried to ask flippantly, but my voice cracked and squeaked and it made me sound terrified. Which I was.

"Bella!" he screamed. I flinched. "Bella, how _could_ you? I left so you would have a chance at being _normal_, not so you could run off with the first _monster_ you find!"

"Jacob is _not_ a monster! And he _is_ normal!"

"No he's not, Bella, he's dangerous," Alice chimed in.

"Stay out of this, Alice!" I snapped. I immediately felt guilty about it. Alice's beautiful face crumpled and she turned around and slowly walked toward the door. "Alice!" I called after her. "Alice, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you!"

"Whatever, Bella," was all the said before she escaped out the door, leaving me alone with Edward.

"Bella," he started. "This isn't right. He's dangerous!"

"Oh, and you're not?"

"I wasn't implying that I was safer to be around than he, although if I said it, it wouldn't be a lie.." His voice trailed off.

"Jacob _saved_ me. If it weren't for Jacob, I would be _dead_ right now. Maybe worse. If you're going to hate anyone, if you're going to call _anyone_ in this situation a monster, look at yourself!" I screamed. I turned on my heel and stomped down the stairs. Edward was standing at the front door when I turned around the corner. I let out an exasperated sigh.

"Edward, move." I demanded.

"No," he simply replied.

"What do you _want_ from me, Edward? I'm emotionally drained. I need sleep. I need to see Jacob. I can't deal with this crap right now."

"Bella, I'm not going to let you leave. I don't care if I have to hold you hostage. I can't let you be around Jacob. He's not safe!"

"And being held hostage in a house full of vampires is the introduction to Safety 101?" I retorted.

"Alice left. It's just you and me." His words stung. Poor Alice, what had I done? She was only trying to help. She had the best of intentions...

"Look, Edward, my life was going _fine_ before you blew back into town. I was finally happy again, I was with a good guy. I was safe and I was cared for. Jacob would _never_ let anything happen to me, and he's proved that to me!"

"What do you mean?" he asked, eyeing me suspiciously. Oops. I said too much. I sighed, not really wanting to tell Edward about Victoria. As if he needed another reason to stick around Forks.

"Jake and his pack are protecting me right now." I said calmly.

"Protecting you?" he snorted. "From _what_?"

"Victoria," I whispered hesitantly. His whole body went stiff, his eyes burned black.

"What!?" he snarled. "Victoria is here?"

"Yeah," I sighed. "She's been here for a while. She keeps trying to get into Forks. She's trying to kill me. But Jake and his pack have been watching out for me. They never let me out of their sight."

Edward's eyes were as dark as night and filled with fury. "Why didn't you tell me this?" he demanded.

"Uhm, let me think Edward, maybe because you were _not supposed to exist_! You weren't anywhere to be found! Have you seriously forgotten that shit _already_?"

He flinched. "Bella, I'm not going to let you out of my sight. The werewolves are probably more dangerous than Victoria is."

I snorted. "No, Edward, they're not. And if you don't let me go, Jake is going to come looking for me. And if he finds out you've been holding me hostage, he'll _kill_ you."

Edward's face filled with misery. "Bella," he choked, "What happened to you? What happened to the soft, delicate, sweet girl I fell in love with?"

I stared him straight in the eye, and with confidence I told him, "You _broke_ her." And with that, I pushed past Edward, who didn't even bother to stop me, and made my way to La Push.


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N:**__ This was another hard chapter to write. It's hard for me to write the smut, because uh, I've never gotten all down and dirty with Jacob Black. And if I _had_, you better believe I wouldn't be on FanFiction, man. I'd be making beautiful half-werewolf babies. Hahaha. And thank you to the wonderful people who've reviewd. It makes me happy to know people are enjoying my story. And to the people who have added me to their alerts, thank you thank you! :D Oh & PS: this chapter is probably borderline rated M. ;)_

* * *

The truck moaned to a stop in front of Jacob's house. I knew he could hear me pull up, and I was a little hurt when I realized he wasn't going to come out and greet me. My hands were still trembling from the confrontation between Edward and I. Taking in a deep breath, I tried to calm myself down. I glanced at the door again. Nope, Jacob wasn't coming out. Looks like _I_ was going _in_.

I knocked three times on the door and waited for what felt like an eternity. With my ear pressed against the door, I strained to hear the sounds coming from inside. I heard a TV shut off and a door close. Did Jacob _really_ just ignore me like that? I became enraged and pounded on the door. Nothing. I turned the handle, surprised to find that the door was unlocked. I stepped inside, glancing around for any sight of Billy. I didn't see him, and then remembered that he was staying at Sue Clearwater's tonight. Quietly I made my way to Jacob's room. I almost bumped into a vacuum cleaner that was sitting in the dark hallway, but I luckily avoided it at the last minute. I stopped at his door and sighed, my hand hesitating. After composing myself, I grabbed the knob and pushed.

"Jake?" I asked.

"How did you get in here, Bella?" he groaned. So he _hadn't_ heard me.

"Well I was knocking for an eternity and when you didn't answer, I grabbed the doorknob, and just my luck, the door was unlocked." I replied.

"Wonderful. What do you want?" he snapped. I cringed. Did I really hurt him this bad? I made my way across the room and sat down next to him on the edge of his bed.

"Jake, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I just _needed_ to see Edward. I needed some answers. I guess I don't expect you to understand, but I would really love if you could somehow forgive me," I pleaded. He looked at me, struggling with his decision. I didn't expect him to be so upset about this situation.

"Bella," he started, his voice much softer than before, "I'm not mad at _you_. I'm mad at myself. And I'm mad at Edward. Well, that's putting it lightly, I'm _disgusted_ with Edward. But that's another story. I'm mad at myself for being so stupid. I just need you to understand _me_. I love you Bella, with all my whole heart. When I found out you wanted to go see Edward, I panicked. And in all honesty, I didn't expect to ever see you again. I figured you'd see him again and completely forget about me and run off into the sunset with the filthy leech."

"Oh, Jake!" I said, wrapping my arms around him and burying my head in his chest. "Jake, I would never do that. I love you, too. You're my whole world now, can't you see that? I could never leave you like that! Yes, I might have loved Edward, and some part of me probably still loves him, but he _hurt_ me. I can't trust him. And for whatever tiny part of me that still loves him, an _enormous_ part of me absolutely hates him!"

Jacob smirked, obviously taking pleasure in that last statement. "So, you're not leaving me?" he asked.

"No, Jacob, don't be stupid!" I said playfully, shoving him in the shoulder. "There is nothing left between me and Edward. There is no chance on this Earth that me and him will get back together."

I stood up in front of the bed. Jacob and I were nearly eye level. I leaned forward and kissed him softly on the lips. When I pulled away, our eyes met. He smiled and I whispered, "I love you."

Jacob wrapped his arms around me and held me for a long time. The rythmic thud of his heartbeat was calming, and I sat down on his lap and laid my head on his shoulder. He looked down at me and in that instant, my heart lept. I knew that I wanted to be with Jacob. I wanted to be with him in a way I could never be with Edward.

Almost as if Jacob could hear my thoughts, he leaned back into the bed, pulling me with him. Our lips met, softly at first, but the kiss quickly turned passionate and before I realized what was happening, Jacob and I were naked, his fiery hands roaming my body. There was no awkwardness. We weren't nervous. We were actually _giggling_. It was light and fun. It was _love_. Jacob's curious fingers slipped inside me and we both moaned in pleasure. My heart was pounding and my insides were doing gymnastics. I rolled over on top of Jacob, his hardness pressing against my stomach, and kissed him on the lips, then the neck, then the chest, my mouth leaving a trail until I ended at his erection. I looked up at him and laughed at his face. His eyebrows were shot up to his hairline and his mouth hung open in an "O". I couldn't resist the fit of laughter his face threw me into and I kissed him again, our tongues dancing together in some new unknown movement.

We fooled around in his bed for a long time, putting off the obvious finale of our show. When he finally entered me, a shot of electricity flashed through me. I clung to his scorching body and his hands knotted through my hair. I felt like I was on top of the world- this was the best feeling _ever_. I was so close, so very close. And then something went terribly wrong. I was caught up in the moment and my lips landed on Jacob's neck. I opened my mouth and lightly took his soft red skin in between my teeth.

A snarl came from deep inside Jacob's chest, and before I could blink I was sprawled on the floor and Jacob was crouched in the corner of his bed shaking violently, his demeanor defensive and frightening. My eyes shot wide open in terror. It took him a minute to compose himself and realize what had happened. I was so scared I started crying, and Jacob's face fell.

"Bella," he whispered. He jumped off the bed and swooped me up into a tight hug. "Oh, no, oh, Bella, I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me, Bella.." he groaned.

"Aw, Jake, 's okay. I should've known you'd be a little sensitive on your neck. I'm sorry!" I stuttered between sobs.

"Bella, please, you have nothing to be sorry about. I didn't mean to scare you, Bells. I'm such a fucking _freak_. Any normal guy wouldn't _snarl_ at his girlfriend during sex!" he cried, exasperated.

If anything could ruin a perfect mood, that was it.


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N:**__ So, I wrote this chapter a while ago, but was never completely satisfied with it, so two days ago I threw it out and re-wrote it. And now, I think I'm going to expand this whole story. The original story was eight chapters, and I think I want to add at least five more (for a total of thirteen chapters) It's still going to go in the same direction, have the same outcome, but I think I want to add a little more background, a little more story, and a little more drama ;) If for some reason anyone wants to read the original Chpt7 and Chpt8, send me a message !_

* * *

I sat silently on the couch in Jacob's gigantic sweats, a slice of cold pepperoni pizza in my hands. I took a bite, chewed, and swallowed. It was disgusting. Eating food made me nauseous right now. I sighed, getting up from the couch. I tossed the remainder of my slice into the garbage with a dull thud. Settling back into the couch, last night's thoughts blew through my head.

_"Bella, please, I'm so sorry."_

_"No, Jacob, really, it's not about that. I'm just tired, that's all."_

_"Please take the bed, then."_

_"No, no, I want the couch. I'm fine, Jake, really."_

The sound of a door closing snapped me back to the present. I turned around instinctively and saw Jacob walking down the stairs. His face was puffy from sleep and his eyes were squinting in the morning sunlight that streamed through the windows.

"Good morning," I said, throwing a smile on my face. I got up and crossed the room into Jacob's arms.

"Er, 'morning," he mumbled, his voice thick. "Are you, I mean, did you want to talk about-" I cut him off before he could continue.

"No, Jake, please. Let's just move on from that." I hung my head and walked over to the couch.

"Okay," he whispered. He walked away from me, into the kitchen. I could hear him banging around in there, and it sounded like he was making a bowl of cereal. When he finally emerged, he had a monstrous mixing bowl which held the contents of nearly an entire box of cereal, and probably a half gallon of milk.

"Want some?" he asked, grinning broadly.

"Haha, no that's fine Jake. You're such a piggy!" I teased.

"Hey, hey, I'm a growing boy!" We both laughed. I was glad we could still be comfortable around each other despite last night's strange events.

"So, Bella, there's something I wanted to ask you," he started hesitantly. I turned and looked at him. "Uh, well, I just was wondering..." He cleared his throat. "Are you my girlfriend now? I mean, I'm just asking because we kissed, and then last night was like, wow, I mean, before the whole, you know, thing..." He stumbled on over his words. I laughed and held up a finger to his lips.

"Jacob Black, if you want me, I'm yours," I said, smiling. He relaxed and pulled me into his chest, holding me against him. I noticed he'd _already_ finished the cereal, and the empty bowl was now sitting on the ground by the couch. He grabbed the remote and flicked on the TV. I honestly couldn't tell you what was playing on the television. I was too busy trying to keep my composure. Jacob was threading his fingers through my hair and kissing the top of my head. His hot fingers and warm, woodsy breath were enchanting. Even though I wasn't tired, I felt myself dozing off and daydreaming.

Later that evening, Jacob asked me to go with him to Sam Uley's place for a barbeque get-together he was having. I guess Quil, Embry, and Jared were going to be there, too. I called Charlie to make sure it was okay for me to go, and to no one's surprise, he said yes.

"So, Bella, are you like, Jacob's _girlfriend_ or something now?" Embry teased. Jacob choked on his hot dog.

I laughed. "Actually, yes," I replied. Now it was Embry's turn to choke on food. Quil snapped his head around to look at me so quick I thought it might fly off. And Sam smiled broadly behind his plate. His reaction was unnerving, like he had some secret he wasn't going to share with me. I was going to ask him why he was smiling so weirdly, but before I could open my mouth, Sam and Jacob both jumped to their feet at the same time, whipping their heads in the same direction- east.

"Huh?" I mumbled, confused. Emily shot me a silencing look, which really only added to my confusion.

"Quil, go get Paul. Run to Charlie's house. Jared, Embry, take the northern borders. Jacob and I will take the eastern borders." Quil nodded, but just barely before he bolted into the forest behind Sam's house. I blinked, and turned to look at Embry, but him and Jared were already gone. My hands started shaking.

"Wha- what's going on?" I asked. My throat was suddenly dry, and talking was like swallowing sand.

"Shh, Bella," Jacob said calmly, stroking my head. "Stay here with Emily, and please be very, very quiet. Do not leave the house. Please, for the love of God, do not leave the house." Something in his tone frightened me, and I simply nodded. He kissed my forehead and was gone.

I was curled up on the couch in Emily's house, wearing a warm fleece pair of her pajamas. She was sitting on the loveseat across from me in sweats. She'd made us both tea, but I barely touched mine.

"Em, what's going on? They've been gone almost an hour," I whispered. She just shook her head.

"Don't worry, Bella, they'll be home soon." She tried to plaster a smile on her face, but it didn't reach her eyes. She was as scared as I was.

The hour passed. And another. Finally, two hours and forty seven minutes later, Sam and Jared burst through the front door. They were out of breath and incredibly disheveled. The breath I'd been holding in my burning lungs was finally released when Sam spoke.

"It's over, Bella. Victoria's dead." I crumpled into the couch and sobbed. It took five minutes of overwhelming emotion before a thought crossed my mind.. _Where was Jacob?_

"Sam?" I asked, looking up from the couch, cheeks flushing at my embarrassing display of emotion.

"Yeah?" he sighed. He seemed to already know what I was going to ask him.

"Where's Jacob? Wasn't he with you?"

"Bella," he said, crossing the room and sitting beside me on the couch. I held my breath. _NO!_ I thought, _No, no, no, no! Jacob is fine, please oh please let him be okay!!_ Emily came and wrapped her arm around the other side of my shoulders. "Jacob will be okay, he just needs a little time to heal."

"Heal?" My words stuck in my throat, it was getting hard to focus. "Heal from what?"

"Well, Victoria got him pretty good. But it's nothing he won't get over. Don't worry, he'll be fine in a couple of days."

"A couple of days!?" I shouted. "What!? I need to see him, oh this is all my fault. Please, Sam, where is he?"

"Billy's house."

I ran out the front door and into my pickup. My hands were shaking too hard to get the key anywhere _near_ the ignition. Frustrated, I let out a scream that had been building up inside me for nearly three hours. I banged my head on the steering wheel in frustration before clutching onto it and breaking down. I sobbed into the steering wheel and confided my secrets into it.

_Why Jacob? What had he ever done to deserve this? He was hurt, badly, and it was all my fault. I wish I could turn back time, I would never have come to Forks._

That last thought ripped through my heart like a hurricane. _But,_ I whispered to my steering wheel, _if I'd never come to Forks, I would never have known Edward, or Alice, or the rest of the Cullens. I'd have never known Jacob, or Billy, Emily, Sam, or the rest of the wolfpack. I'd have never known I could love so many people so much in so many different ways._

I was finally able to collect myself after fifteen minutes of sobbing and whispering. My hands were shaking considerably less, but still enough to make it difficult to put the key in. I finally did, and the truck sputtered and roared to life, groaning in protest as I sunk the pedal to the floor, trying to get to Jacob's house as quickly as possible.


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N: **__Thanks so much everyone for the wonderful reviews. I'm so happy you guys are enjoying this! For now, since this story was supposed to be only eight chapters, I'm in real time with you guys. I'll post Chapter Nine as soon as I finish it, and I'll try to work on ten and eleven tonight. My best friend was induced a midnight last night, so my little niece Laney Renee should be born today! I might be too busy to write. But I already have my entire outline finished for the whole story, so I know what I'm going to write about, it's just a matter of doing it, haha. Enjoy! :)_

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Billy answered the door looking tired and thin. His eyes were red and puffy. That put me on edge.

"H-hey Billy, can I see Jacob?" I asked, my voice cracking. My hands were shaking incredibly fast.

"Yeah, Bella," he sighed, "Come on in."

I tried my hardest to not run to Jacob's room, so I took the stairs one at a time and walked slowly down the hallway. I got to the door and paused, taking in a deep breath. I pushed it open and blinked. It was illuminated by a dull bedside table, and Jacob was laying in the bed. His eyes were closed, and I figured he was sleeping. He was, after all, rapidly healing from a battle with a vengeful vampire. I'm sure that takes a lot of energy out of a person.

"Bells?" he asked, his voice clear as day. It made me jump. I don't know why, but I figured his voice would be thick and hoarse, like mine was when _I_ won my battle with a vampire and landed in the hospital.

"Hey," I said nervously, "How are you?" I walked over to the bed and sat on the edge, taking his fiery hand in mine.

"I'm fine. I'm a quick healer. I mostly have to lay here all wrapped up so that my bones heal in the right place. If I move, or get up and walk or even sit up in the bed, they could set wrong and then the doctor would have to re-break them." We both winced at the last thought. I remember when my leg had broken last year. It was not something I'd care to experience ever again.

"I'm glad you're not dead, Jake. I was so worried about you."

He laughed a hearty laugh. It was so odd; he should be in _gobs_ of pain right now. "Bella, I don't know how many times I'll have to explain this to you before you'll understand. I'm _made_ for this. My whole body was made to kill bloodsuckers. And that's exactly what I did last night." He smiled, and it made me smile. I realized I'd been frowning for a long time.

"How long will you be like this?" I asked.

"The doctor said to lay here for two days to make sure the bones set right. Then I'm free to get up and move around."

I smiled. Two days. I could manage that.

"The countdown begins," I said, crawling up next to him in the bed, careful not to rest on him or put too much pressure on his rapidly healing body.

* * *

_Two Weeks Later_

* * *

I was so hungry. In my rush to get to school on-time for the first day back from Spring Break, I'd completely skipped breakfast. _Although_, I thought, infuriated, _if Jake and I hadn't stayed up so late last night talking on the phone, I might not have punched the snooze button on my alarm clock five times this morning. Then I wouldn't be hungry._

I glanced up at the clock for the billionth time. _Ten more freaking minutes._ I could make it that long, right? I found myself wishing I was superhumanly fast like ninety percent of the people I knew in this lazy town. I could run from the classroom to the front of the lunch line as soon as the bell rang. No, a millisecond _before_ the bell rang. Yeah, then I'd for _sure_ be the first person in line. I ran over in my head all the awesome things I could do if I were superhuman. Maybe werewolf.. Maybe vampire. Hell, if werewolves and vampires existed, couldn't _witches_ and other supernatural creatures? Maybe I'd be a witch. Hah. I had to stifle a chuckle.

_RRRRIIIIIIINNNNGGGG!!_

I leapt out of my seat and bolted for the door. I was proud of myself for making it to the cafeteria without falling flat on my face. The best part was when I approached the glass doors, I could only see a handful of my classmates already in the lunch line. _Eh, who needs first place? I'm close enough,_ I thought to myself. Just as I was about to grab the door, an familiar face appeared, inches from mine. The face had hands that reached out and grabbed me gently by the shoulders, pulling me away to the side of the cafeteria. I swear steam was coming out my ears, I was so mad.

_"EDWARD!", _I hissed, "What the _heck_ are you doing!?"

"I decided to come back to school, finish out my senior year. I didn't want to show up in class this morning though, because I wanted to ask you first if it was okay."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't caaare," I whined, "You have as much right to your free education as the next person here! Now can you _puh-lease_ move out of my way! I'm staaarving!"

"Bella, can we just talk about some things first?" he pleaded, his sparkling topaz eyes burning into me. God he was gorgeous, and it pissed me off.

"Edwaaaard," I whined again. "Please, seriously, I'm so freaking hungry, can we do this another time?"

Before I could get his response- well, before I could even blink- Edward had run into the cafeteria and filled a tray with a slice of pizza, a bag of chips, and a Snapple. My usual lunch combo.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. "Fine. Let's sit."

"Excellent!" he grinned.

"But I can carry my _own_ damn tray of food, thanks." I snapped, snatching the tray from his hands.

I was incredibly surprised I was able to take the tray from him, and I could tell he was too. Mostly because his eyebrows shot up to the sky and his smile disappeared. And also because he looked me dead in the eye and asked, "How in the world did you do that?"

I shrugged, trying to play it off. Edward was still dumbfounded but led me to one of the green picnic tables outside of the cafeteria. _Of course_. It was foggy and misty and wet and freezing outside, and he wanted me to sit _outdoors_? Jerk.

"I wanted to ask you something, and I really want you to think about your answer, and be perfectly honest with me," he said in a serious but soft tone. One of my eyebrows shot up and I looked at him sideways. Sometimes I wish I could hear what was going through his mind.

"Uhhhm," I said, my mouth full of pizza. "Sure?"

"Do you love me?"

I choked. Snatching up my Snapple and guzzling it down gave me some time to process what he said and think of a response, but not enough time.

"Yes, I do," I said honestly. He just nodded, his expression never changing.

"How serious are you and the dog?" I growled at his slur, and for the second time so far this lunch period I startled both him _and_ myself. Since when do I _growl_?

"Since when do you _growl_?" He asked me exactly the same way I asked myself.

"Jacob is _not_ a dog, we're very serious, and I don't know, I guess I was just a little irritated."

He eyed me suspiciously. "Bella, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I mumbled quickly. But I was asking myself the same question. _Was_ I okay?

"So," Edward started, a painful expression on his beautiful face, "does this mean we're over?"

I sighed after a long pause. "Yeah, Edward."

"There's no chance of us being together anymore?" He was pleading now, begging me to change my mind.

"Edward, I really did love you. _A lot_. A part of me still does, and probably always will. But can't you see? You left, and I moved on. And as much as I may have loved you, and as able as I am to forgive you, I will never, ever forget. I think right now it would be best for us to remain friends, if that. I just really hope you can understand."

He nodded. I think if vampires could cry he'd be crying right now.

"Edward, listen-" I started, but he cut me off.

"No, Bella, it's okay. I understand. I actually have to get going now." He got up and walked away from the table. He was about five steps away from me when he turned around and asked, "Can I drive you home from school today?"

"Sure," I smiled, trying to make him feel better, "I'd like that."


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N: **__Short chapter, sorry. The next one will be a bit longer, I promise, and chapter eleven will be REALLY long, probably too long, haha. Oh, and I have really big plans for the next three chapters. :) Enjoy!!_

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Edward had obviously been planning on me accepting his offer to drive me home from school. He was waiting by my truck after school, his shiny Volvo nowhere in sight. What would he have done if I had declined his offer? That was a long walk. I laughed out loud when I remembered that Edward was definitely still a vampire and could run home faster than he could drive home.

He mistook my laughter at my stupidity for happiness to see him. His cold, hard face broke into a huge grin. He walked over to me to fill in the space between us. I resisted the urge to groan and roll my eyes.

"Hey," he said, taking my hands and intertwining my fingers in his. "How was your day?"

"Edward, you can't do that," I said, stopping and looking down at our hands. His touch was icy and strong and it made an electric current run through my body. _Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob, Jacob,_ I thought. I had to keep reminding myself why I wasn't with Edward anymore. Black sorrow flashed through his golden eyes. He released my hand.

"Sorry," he muttered.

I climbed into my truck and handed him the keys. He smiled as he took them from me and turned them into the ignition. The ride home was silent, but it wasn't awkward. It was an understanding silence. Edward understood that I was with Jacob now, and he was going to let me move on. _Hopefully_. Truth was, I had no idea what Edward was thinking.

Just before we turned the corner that led to my street, Edward stiffened. I looked out the window, trying to see what he had just seen.

"What? What is it?" I asked.

He grinned down at me. "You're incredibly perceptive, Bella," he said. "I didn't think I'd moved _that_ much."

"Oh," I said. How do I respond to something like that? Especially when his amazing liquid topaz eyes were gazing into mine. My heart skipped a beat and then picked up in double speed, which made my cheeks flush. _God_, I thought, _this is so embarrassing._ I really hoped Edward wouldn't get the wrong opinion.

"What are you thinking?" he whispered, his velvet voice crushing through all the barriers I'd tried so hard to put up. Maybe the ride home was a bad idea.

"How I hope my beating heart and pink cheeks won't give you the wrong idea," I said honestly.

"Oh," was his only reply. He started smirking, though, when we reached the house. He pulled into the driveway, turned the car off, and turned to look at me. I could smell his sweet breath filling the cab. I had to get out. I needed fresh air. I was far too close to Edward right now.

I jumped out of the car and stood by the truck. He got out, not nearly as fast and twice as graceful, and joined me at my side. His face was now only inches from mine. He smiled the crooked smile that made me go weak in the knees. Where were my defenses? Surely one boy couldn't have so much power over my self control, could he?

"Bella," he whispered, almost a moan. I was staring at the ground, burning holes into the gravel driveway with my eyes. If I looked up, I would lose my composure. I wouldn't, I _couldn't _look up. Edward gently reached his fingers under my chin and pulled my face up to look into his eyes. My heart was _pounding_, my hands were demanding me to release them, to let them weave through Edward's cool hair, my lips quivered, wishing so badly to be pressed against Edward's. The only thing I was in control of was my brain. My brain was screaming at me to turn around and run, run into the house, run to the truck, run into the forest, run anywhere but here. He whispered out a moan into my ear. "Bella, please, let me prove myself to you."

His lips crashed into mine and my hands reached around the back of his head, my fingers interrwined in his hair. I tried to pull away, but he tightened his grasp. My body wanted this, more than anything, but my brain was screaming _NO!_ I heard the sound of popping glass and a deep growl. It didn't seem to effect Edward, but I was pulling away, already knowing who it came from.

"Jake!" I yelled helplessly, waiting for his response. Suddenly, Edward went flying off me and across the yard. A huge red wolf was tumbling with him, growling and gnashing his teeth. Edward's screeching snarl was bloodchilling.

"Jake, please, Jacob! Jacob stop! Look at me, Jacob, please calm down. Please stop! Charlie's going to be home any minute!" I pleaded. Edward and the huge wolf both stopped in their place. Edward took a step toward me and Jacob appeared where the wolf once stood, stark naked. I sucked in a sharp breath- Jacob was surely something to look at. I wanted to cry when I watched him reach down and pick up a pair of shorts attached to his leg and pull them over himself. He was smirking, and Edward was snarling.

"What is _wrong_ with you two?" I screamed. "Why, Edward, why? You _knew_ that Jacob was here. You could smell him, read his thoughts. Why in the world did you do that to him- to ME!"

"I wanted you to see this. I wanted you to see how dangerous and frightening Jacob was," he replied simply and apologetically. Jacob growled.

"I've already _seen_ Jacob's wolf form. It doesn't scare me. You want to know what scared me? _YOU!_ I was terrified! If something had happened to Jacob, I would have done anything in my power to make you as miserable as possible!"

Jacob smiled when he realized that _Edward_ had made the first move.

"Bella, please, for your own safety, please choose me." Edward pleaded.

I marched up to Edward and punched him in the face.

And then, I let out a bloodcurdling scream.


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N: **__Another fairly short chapter. Next one will be super-super long, but definitely not boring. I promise! And I'll be pretty busy tomorrow, and Chpt11 isn't quite perfect yes, so I'm gonna have it posted no later than Sat Afternoon. I'm starting to get writer's block lol. Good thing I typed up an outline a few days ago. I know exactly where this story's headed :D_

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"You _punched_ Edward in the _face_?" Dr. Cullen asked, dumbfounded.

"Yeah," I admitted.

"Why? Or do really want to know?"

I grimaced. As much as Dr. Cullen loved me, he loved Edward more. "He intentionally kissed me to set Jacob off. He tried to enrage Jacob so much that he would turn into a wolf, and it worked. He did it so that I would be _scared_ of Jacob and leave him. He wanted Jacob to try and _hurt me_."

Pain washed over Carlisle's face as he finished setting the brace on my arm. I had shattered a couple knuckles and snapped my wrist. It hurt like nothing else I'd ever felt before- worse than breaking my leg. The excuse we gave Charlie was I tried to punch Edward, but missed and hit the brick exterior of the house. This only made Charlie even _more_ angry at Edward. Jacob had swooped me up and drove me to the hospital in my truck. Edward had a peculiar look on his face. He was shaking and he was trying hard to keep his mouth closed. His forehead was crumpled in confusion. He stood there in the lawn until Jacob turned around the corner and sped off to the hospital.

"I think you did the right thing," Carlisle said, snapping me out of my memories.

"Oh?"

"Yes. What Edward did was incredibly foolish. I think you punching him hurt him worse than it hurt you."

I snorted and held up my arm, as if to display my wrist and knuckles for him. "You sure about that?"

"Think about it Bella," he said softly. "The biggest focus of Edward's life is keeping you safe and out of pain. And for him, to think you'd inflict such pain on yourself, knowing without a doubt it wouldn't physically effect him at all, that is tearing him up inside."

I did think about it. And I guess in the back of my mind I always knew that. It just sounded different coming from Carlisle's mouth.

"I know you love Jacob, Bella, but I also know you love Edward. Some part of you, however indistinct, is head over heels for him. Otherwise, you wouldn't have punched him. And the incredibly selfish part of me is begging you to choose Edward. I know how he feels about you, and he is determined to prove himself to you. It's not like the first time he met you, Bella. He wants you now more than he did then, and not because of competition. And not because of your scent. Because he _knows_ you, and embarrassing as it may sound coming from your ex-boyfriend's vampire dad, he knows you in ways no one else ever will." I blushed. He continued. "He's had you, and he's lost you. He knows both sides of the fence. And he'd rather be on the side of the fence that _has you_. I guess what I'm trying to tell you is, because I'm selfish, I wish you would choose Edward over Jacob, because this that he's going through is breaking his heart."

I nodded. It was hard coming up with the right words to say. I couldn't think of a response. I was grateful when Jacob showed up at my room, knocking on the door. He stiffened when he saw Dr. Cullen but his face smiled.

"Thank you, Doctor," he said politely.

"Just doing my job," Carlisle smiled brilliantly. He left the room, but not before pausing in the doorway and locking his eyes into mine. He smiled softly and sighed, then turned around and continued out.

"Ready to go home, Bells? Charlie's waiting in the hall." Jacob extended his hand to my good one, and I willingly took it. I was so tired. I just wanted a hot shower and a good, long night's sleep. It was eight o'clock, but by the time I got home and go out of the shower it was quarter after nine. I pulled on my tattered sweats and a tank top, crawled into bed, and fell asleep.

_A beautiful, tiny, red-skinned girl was standing beside me, holding my hand. She had long black hair and sparkling onyx eyes. She couldn't have been more than four or five years old. I turned down to look at her. She was tugging on my hand. "What?" I asked her. "You love him," she said. "Who?" I asked in reply. To that, she simply pointed. I followed her finger to the top of a grassy hill. There was nothing, no one, there. "Who? I don't see.." I asked, my voice trailed off. "You will," the little girl said, giggling and running off into the forest. I stood in my spot, staring at the top of the hill, trying to see who she was pointing at..._

I woke up with a start. It was seven thirty-nine. One minute before my alarm would go off. I reached over and shut it off, then rolled out of bed and haphazardly got dressed. I chose a black tank top and dark grey jeans. It was supposed to be fairly warm and sunny today. I was ecstatic. Warmth, sunshine, and no Edward. No Edward meant no embarrassment, no awkwardness, and best of all- no one to interrupt me on my way to lunch.

I was starving, and since I'd showered the night before, I'd opted out this morning, which gave me an extra half-hour in my morning routine. I decided to (one-handedly!) style my hair and put on a touch of makeup. I used mousse to style my long waves. I added a touch of mascara and some tinted lip balm to my face. I looked at the clock. I still had an extra fifteen minutes. I decided that instead of my usual poptart or cereal for breakfast, I'd make eggs and bacon. I _was_ hungry, after all. Last night's drama (oh, the drama, seemed it was becoming a more and more regular occurrence in my life) I was absolutely famished. It was a little harder cooking with one hand, and I only managed to break two eggs. I figured I'd break at least a half-dozen. I threw the bacon in the microwave and put a slice of bread in the toaster. When the food was ready, I wolfed it down in less than five minutes.

Now, I was stuffed. I grabbed my book bag and practically rolled out to my truck. The sunshine was beautiful and brilliant. The temperature was a perfect 78, and there were no clouds in the sky. Too bad my wrist was broken, or I could go swimming with Jake at First Beach. Guess I'd have to opt for sitting on the bench in the garage while Jake tinkered away at the Rabbit. I smiled. It sounded like a good plan to me.


	11. Chapter 11

_**A/N:**__ Last chapter. I'd planned on extending this into two or three different chapters, but I have been incredibly busy packing for California, so I haven't had the time. I've got an outline for a sequel, as well as a bunch of ideas for oneshots (unrelated to Drive My Soul) I hope you guys loved the story (and the ending) Thanks a lot to my readers and reviewers. This is my first-ever finished, published FanFiction. :D_

I had another dream about the red-skinned girl. She showed up in my dreams every night for a week straight. She was cryptic and it annoyed me. I wanted her to tell me what she was talking about- a different topic every night- but she always insisted I already knew what she was talking about. I told Jacob about the dreams, and he told me he thought I needed more sleep.

I was sitting on the couch in the living room watching a movie. Charlie would be home soon, so I had some beef stew in a crockpot on the counter. I felt like crap all day long. I got a migraine before lunch and came home. I threw up twice before grabbing a can of Sprite and trying to force it down. It stayed down, but the migraine never left. As I relaxed there on the couch, I thought about my past week and a half.

Edward had been in school everyday, but had only said one sentence to me. The rest of the time he acted like I didn't exist. Things between me and Jacob were good, but the both of us were so busy that we played phone tag more than we talked or hung out. And yesterday, at lunch, Alice had this incredibly repulsed look on her face when I had walked by her. I was scared that I'd alienated the Cullens. I didn't want to lose their friendships just because I didn't choose Edward. I loved Alice, and Jasper, Emmet, Carlisle, Esme, and even Rosalie. I wished there was some way to tell them this, but it seemed like _everyone_ was avoiding me lately.

I heard Charlie's cruiser pull up in the driveway and I jumped up from the couch to serve him some dinner. Another wave of nausea hit me and my head throbbed. I took a swig of my Sprite and headed into the kitchen. Dinner was quiet, and Charlie looked like he had something on his mind. I confronted him.

"Are you okay, Dad? You act like you want to talk about something.." I regretted my words as soon as he spoke.

"I talked to Billy Black today."

"Oh?"

"He's worried about you," we both frowned. If Billy was so worried about me, why didn't Jacob tell me? Oh yeah, because he never answers the phone when I call.

"Oh. Why?"

Charlie shrugged his shoulders dramatically. "I don't know, Bells, but I guess Jacob is getting worried now too."

I looked at him, puzzled. If Jacob Black was so damn worried about me, why didn't he drive out to Forks to see me then? Oh my God, was this how _normal_ couples break-up? I'd never experienced a break-up before. My mind raced, and more nausea hit me. I gulped down the rest of my can of Sprite. It didn't help. I leapt from the table and ran to the bathroom, the contents of my stomach now lay in the toilet in front of me.

Charlie walked into the bathroom, a look of concern on his face. "Bells, are you okay?"

I groaned. "Yeah, I've got the flu."

Charlie walked up to me and crouched down. I realized I was still sitting on the floor. He touched a hand to my forehead.

"You're not clammy, or warm, Bella. Are you sure it's the flu?" He raised an eyebrow.

"I don't know. It just started today. Maybe it's food poisoning." My stomach turned, but I didn't puke.

That night I went to bed early and dreamed about the red-skinned girl. She was smaller, but otherwise looked the same. She tugged on my hand, and I looked down at her. Her eyes were big and bright, despite being the color of the night sky. "You love him," she told me. Her voice was strong and sure. I believed her. I looked down at her and smiled. "Who?" I asked. She nodded, and pointed to the top of the damn hill. I wanted to grab her and shake her and scream, _"Enough with the fucking hill! Who the hell do I freaking love!?"_ But I didn't. She nudged me, and I looked at the top of the hill. It was an enormous russet-colored wolf. It was Jacob. The wolf turned from russet to red, and the hills from green to red, and the sky from black to red. Everything turned red. I screamed.

"Bella, Bella, wake up!" Charlie yelled, shaking me. My eyes snapped open and I was in wretchedly horrible pain. My stomach and lower back were cramped and I could hardly breathe. I turned over in my bed and grabbed the wastebasket that was sitting under the nightstand and puked into it.

"Bella, are you okay?" Charlie asked, worriedly. I looked up at him from my wastebasket, and shook my head.

"No," I croaked out. I was covered in cold sweat and shaking hard. My cramps didn't go away. "I need to go to the hospital!"

Charlie nodded and left the room. I got up out of the bed and saw a dark red spot in the bed. I screamed. Charlie ran into the room and followed my frozen eyes to the red spot. His face completely drained of color.

"Bella, what's going on?" His voice shook, and I could tell he was as scared as I was.

"I don't know," I sobbed. He loaded me into the car and sped to the hospital with the cruiser lights on.

The emergency room nurse told me I'd had a miscarriage. I told her it was impossible, that my boyfriend never let himself go all the way with me. She told me something about pre-cum, or something, but her words turned to water in my ears. I blinked a lot, and tried to think. But whenever I did, it hurt. A lot. So I stopped thinking. The gynecologist had told me I was eleven weeks pregnant. _Eleven weeks._ I was a mom for eleven weeks. Even though I was in no way ready for kids, I felt betrayed by my own body. I had my red-skinned child ripped from my body before I even knew she existed.

The gynecologist asked me if I wanted to know the sex. I shook my head no. I didn't tell her, but I already knew. My poor, poor, red-skinned girl. My body had killed my baby girl, my baby girl from my dreams. I told my dad what happened on the way home. He had been so angry in the hospital because no one would tell him what was going on with me. Something about confidentiality, since I was already eighteen. When I told him, he cried. Which made me cry, again. And then I went to bed.

That night, I didn't dream.

_**Two Weeks Later**_

"Jacob?" I asked, my voice cracking.

"Billy told me you were in the hospital. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I replied, switching the phone to my other ear. That was a lie. I was _not_ fine.

"I need to talk to you, in person."

"Okay, I'll be there in five minutes." Before I could respond, he hung up the phone. True to his word, five minutes later, Jacob knocked on the door.

We went outside for a walk in the forest behind the house. Jacob was gorgeous and warm. I was glad he was with me. The forest was freezing. We stopped walking and I buried myself in his arms. The heat overtook me and I felt calmer, more relaxed. He stroke my head and asked me what was wrong.

"Oh Jake!" I cried, sobbing into his chest. "Jacob, I was pregnant!"

He pulled me away and looked at me dumbfounded. "Was?"

"Was," I whispered, swallowing the lump in my throat.

"I don't understand," he said, shaking his head.

"I was pregnant. And then I had a miscarriage. But I didn't know I was pregnant until I had the miscarriage and had to go to the hospital." I explained.

He just nodded his head. We sat down on a fallen trunk and stayed there for a long time. When he finally spoke, his words cut through my heart like a knife.

"Do you still love me?"

I stared into his eyes. He needed to believe me. My words were true. "Of course. I will never stop loving you, Jacob Black."

He nodded. It was my turn to ask a question. "Can you forgive me?" I asked.

His eyes flashed, and I was afraid of his answer. Until he spoke.

"What?" he demanded. "Forgive you for _what_?"

"For letting my body kill our baby!" I shrieked.

"Bella, you didn't kill our baby. It was nature. It had to happen. It'll be okay," he cooed. It was hot. I realized he'd been holding me against his chest. His fingers were in my hair and his voice was soothing my thoughts. _Shh, Bella, it's not your fault. Don't think that. It wasn't you. It's okay._

That night, I dreamed about my daughter.

"It's okay, Mommy. You weren't ready for me." She smiled up at me and hugged me around my knees before walking off into the trees at the base of the moonlit hill.


End file.
